Thursday, May 16, 2013

If ya can't say anything nice... (Feb. 21, 2013)

     Well it's been a few weeks since I have posted, sorry for neglecting y'all.  In my defense the last month has been very busy! The kids and I traveled back to Las Vegas to pack up our stuff, BTW we have way too much stuff, even after four trips to goodwill.  10 days was a pretty tight schedule but somehow we managed to homeschool and  pack up, not going to lie there were a couple of moments when I didn't think I would survive. Without my pretty amazing friends (you know who you are!) who kept my kids on multiple occasions  I would not have met the deadline.  After we left Vegas we headed to Utah with all our stuff. We then spent a nice week at Grandma & Grandpa's homeschooling and finding a contractor to help us build our new house in Utah.  Done and Done!

     Back to the title... So we came home and got back to normal.  I sat down to write several times and all I kept thinking was  if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all!
Well every time I sat down to write I just couldn't think of anything wonderful and uplifting to write. I think I felt that everyone else felt sheer joy at the thought of spending so much quality time with their kids, I just never seemed to feel the sheer joy. Don't get me wrong most days  are pretty good and I think to myself " I'm getting the hang of this.", and then usually within 3 minutes everything crashes down around me. Typically it's quarreling kids, or the terrorizing 3 year old,  and usually it happens the moment I walk into the tiny cubicle we call the bathroom. 
     I had an epiphany this morning when one of the busy mother's I totally look up to complained of a stressful week and having to deal with problems with her kids. I do feel bad for her, but I am truly grateful for her honesty this morning. It brought me a ray of hope, hope that my kids are normal. That it's okay for siblings to fight, 3 year olds will be naughty, and it's not because I am a bad mom--it's just a part of growing up.  Something I forget, because I didn't grow up with my siblings I was 10 years behind my brother, I was more of an only lonely kiddo with no one to quarrel with. I always dreamed of someone close to my age so I could have a friend, now I just don't empathize with my kids and their constant bickering. They have what I dreamed of and they just don't appreciate it.
I am learning and beginning to see that it's normal for them to argue, still don't like it, but I learning to tolerate it. I just need to thank those of you who have kids, and did grow up with brothers and sisters, thanks for reassuring me that my kids are normal, and I am not the worst mom ever!

So now I've gone and done it... I said a bunch of not so nice things about my kids. I do love them and I am enjoying this opportunity to be their teacher, but I am grateful that our life in this tiny little home won't be forever.
     Thanks for listening,


Patsy Mecham said...

Be sure to save this for our posterity. Someday Emily will read this when she is discouraged and realize she can do it too. So good.